just in case anyone is still out there...

...if not, then this is mostly for myself anyways.

my life is beautiful. the beauty has always been there, but i was too envious of other's to see it. i want my own life now, not to fantasize about someone else's. i now appreciate it for all the wonder and glory it holds. though the end of that last sentence sounds like its from the bible, it is true. now i love myself, and not because of anyone else. i know i am not even close to the ideal human being, and i show my thankfulness every day for this. these days i cry with joy instead of dejection.

i hope you all soon feel the same if you already don't <3